X2 what James said...most things fail in bending, not shear. It was one of the first things they emphasized in enginerding school stress analysis classes when we started to study shear stress and failure analysis. As with anything, there are exceptions, but if you design for bending, shear rarely becomes an issue.
As for ram-assist cylinder bore size, I went around and around on that as well, but if you look at most of the EB houses, talk to PSC and West Texas Off-Road, etc, they're mostly Ø1.5" to Ø2" rams. I chose the Ø2" for my application since I'm running Ø37's and prefer less force differential (~10%) between steering left and right due to the rod diameter, and I believe I bought it through Wild Horses 4X4 since they were the most helpful on the phone at the time. Your pump setup is way better than mine, so that's probably the next thing I'll need to address on my build.