redundancy would be bad at that point. and here was my issue...
because it is controlled by a temp switch, once the low speed, coil side of the relay is open, the low speed would be activated. NOW when the high side kicks on, it takes the 12 volts away from the low side control, even though coil is still open, and puts it to the high side. if redundancy was in place (12v fused to low speed control, is constant) it would have 12v in both high and low speeds! which i think played a part in my initial failure.
idk.... i still dont run with my low speed connected at the moment because i have things going on (life), but in the next week or two, im gonna re-connect the low side and see if i blow anything. (whether it be the fan, or a relay/ fuse) (im still concerned about the fan generating voltage to low circuit)
as of now with just high speed, everything is working perfectly!

cycles on at 200, and off at 180.